Dinner in your room, or "Room Service!"

[JayPea]

I have a scintillating job as a grocery clerk/janitor. Whenever I state my occupation the conversation about occupations dies right there. :lol: And I don't ask anyone else about theirs.

 

[alan_s]

I think professionals have a real problem in the dining car eating with strangers. Consider the following--

Person across from you says he/she is a:

1. Lawyer. Would you: A. Smile and say how nice, B. Tell a lawyer joke, C. Tell a bad lawyer story, D. Ask a legal question that's been bothering you and seek free advice?

2. Doctor or dentist. Would you: A. Compliment said individual on his/her education, B. Ask about your current or past ailments, C. Tell a story about a botched procedure or operation, D. Discuss the high cost of health coverage and/or Obamacare?

3. Stock broker. Would you: A. Extol the workings of our capitalist system, B. Decry the money you lost in the market because of a bad tip, or C. Ask for advice?

4. Banker. Would you: A. Praise the format and clarity of your bank statements, B. Complain about high fees, or C. Complain about your difficulty obtaining a mortgage?

Since one of the foregoing applies to me, I always consider eating in my room, and when I go to the dining car, never ever state my occupation!

Not a problem for me. I only discuss their occupation if they volunteer the subject, appear to want to discuss it and I'm interested enough to do so. I'm retired, so the subject doesn't proceed far if they ask me.

 

[Bob Dylan]

Since I'm retired, when someone asks me what I do ( it's an American obsession), I fell them "As little as possible!"

As was said, unless someone volunteers what they do for a living, I don't ask!

I'm interested in who they are, not what they do to earn their daily bread.

 

[Manny T]

it's interesting to read about people who are NOT interested in what table mates do for a living. Americans are so notorious all over the world for asking immediately upon meeting that many European cultures view it as bad manners by us!

 

[StriderGDM]

it's interesting to read about people who are NOT interested in what table mates do for a living. Americans are so notorious all over the world for asking immediately upon meeting that many European cultures view it as bad manners by us!

Strangely my one experience in Europe (ok, UK and I know some consider the two very different was exactly the opposite.

I was at a wedding reception and asked what I did. I told them I was in IT. After that, the person basically stopped talking to me. I mentioned this to one of my UK friends and he said it was a class thing. The person asking the question wasn't really sure how IT related to their job/class (lawyer as I recall) so to be "safer" stopped talking to me because they didn't want to be talking to someone of lower class, or possibly offend me by being presumptuous enough to talk to someone above their class. It was VERY bizarre.

 

[crabby_appleton1950]

As was said, unless someone volunteers what they do for a living, I don't ask!

Since many people relocate for work, school, etc I often ask people where they are from originally. And since I've driven cross country numerous times, and have lived from Maine to Florida to CA and many points in between I often have some familiarity with the area.

 

[Manny T]

StriderGDM your story about your experience in the UK is just great! Americans may be brash, but the English with their class system can be bizarre!

Look at the good side, you were at least spoken to and not rejected based on appearance (which I think is the usual way). Of course, it was a wedding.

Final point--they say travel can be broadening. An experience like that proves it.

Sorry for the digression. Now back to dinner in the room, or not!

 

[andersone]

Father had a little twist on these scenarios. He would inquire of a stranger "Where do you tend bar?

I have taken to this and 95% of the time the response is "I don't tend bar." It either gets good from there on out or it becomes a bust.

 

[trainman74]

Person across from you says he/she is a:

1. Lawyer. Would you: A. Smile and say how nice, B. Tell a lawyer joke, C. Tell a bad lawyer story, D. Ask a legal question that's been bothering you and seek free advice?

I have lawyers in my family. In my experience, "B" is the best answer here, although whatever lawyer joke you know, he or she has probably already heard it, and even told it.

 

[Everydaymatters]

Manny, I also feel it is bad manners and my family has been in the U.S. for, um, well, actually I'm a first generation American.

There are times when my table mates seem to just want to one up each other on how important, or well educated, or wealthy, or powerful they are.

I would love to think up some totally outrageous occupation to set them back on their heels. :giggle:

 

[Ryan]

it's interesting to read about people who are NOT interested in what table mates do for a living. Americans are so notorious all over the world for asking immediately upon meeting that many European cultures view it as bad manners by us!

Real life example (on a train even!): ran into an acquaintance in the parking lot of the train station on the way to work yesterday. I've known this woman for seven years, our sons are the same age and have been in Scouts together for that long. We see each other nearly weekly, have spent hours hanging out around a campfire together on many different camping trips, our boys attend each other's birthday parties, etc.

We arrived at the station just as a train was leaving, so we had some time to kill. We got a cup of coffee, hung out for 20 minutes, then stood together on the train and chatted for another half hour. As we talked, work came up (we were on our way to the office, so it kind of had to), and I realized "I have no ideas what she does!". I know she is a Fed (like me), but not a clue what department or what she does there. The work talk was all generic stuff that could apply to any office (dress code, ability to telework) so I'm still not sure what she does.

For me, it just doesn't really matter. Her and her husband (who is also a Fed, and I know what department he works for, but nothing else) are both awesome people that I enjoy hanging out with, but that has nothing to do what they do from 9-5. There is just so much more to people that is far more interesting most of the time.

 

[TylerP42]

Today when I was at breakfast the man who sat across from me wouldn't say anything or make eye contact with me. He'd give me a dirty look if I tried starting a conversation.

 

[George K]

Today when I was at breakfast the man who sat across from me wouldn't say anything or make eye contact with me. He'd give me a dirty look if I tried starting a conversation.

Yeah, that gets awkward, doesn't it?

D4 and I sat across from a couple of ladies from India on our last trip. They were speaking Hindi, and basically ignored us. This went on for about 10 minutes. Me, being me, opened up and tried to engage them in conversation, and they warmed up to us immediately. They were DELIGHTFUL (both in their 40's, friends traveling together), and we had the most wonderful meal. We joked, laughed, drank wine and traded stories about our cities (DC for them). Never found out what they did, but who cares?

One of our best meals.

 

[crabby_appleton1950]

Me, being me, opened up and tried to engage them in conversation, and they warmed up to us immediately.

I find that true of Mexicans in my area who don't engage in a conversation with me until I begin one and then they become very friendly. I suspect they are used to feeling "invisible" around non-hispanics.

 

[HARHBG]

What I find most annoying is being made to wait for a table when I have a 7:00P.M. reservaton for Dinner and half the Dining Car tables are sitting empty. I have mobility issues, find it gets very uncomfortable, actually gets painful if I have to stand for more than 10 minutes or so. There is no place to sit and wait for a table, Service People won't let you sit at an unused table to wait for a seat. .................Lots of room for improvement here, Amtrak.

That said, I've met some fascinating people in the Dining Car and enjoyed the company. Had a couple "not so great" encounters, but you get through it. If the situation ever was intolerable with a "Table Mate" i'd have no qualms or hesitation moving or doing whatever necessary to end any unpleasantness.

I'm paying for the entire service, beginning to end, so if it's not right I ask it made to be right. Bottom line, which some Amtrak people can't seem to wrap their minds around is that without passengers, no job, period. It really is in THEIR best interest (Amtrak employees) to take care of and service the needs of the fare-paying passengers, period.

I made my liviing in the Food Service Industry most of my life, owning numerious popular, successful restaurants. Successful and popular because I never lost track of WHO was "Boss", ...... WHO actually paid all the bills and allowed me to succeed.

These Amtrak jobs pay well, VERY WELL, especially in the Food Service area, they pay far better than any private-sector Food Service job. They have a phenominal Benefits Package compared to their counter-parts in the private sector. There is no excuse for sloppy, mediocre service, poor quality preparation of food or any other sub-standard service. Any number of people would be so grateful to have such a well-paid, benefits included, secure LIVING-WAGE Food Service job. The "GOOD" Amtrak people realize this and perform accordingly. Unfortunatly, THE FEW lousy ones really do a terrible disservice to the many good ones and need to "move on"...................

 

[neroden]

Neroden:

I can't agree with your assertion that Amtrak is "notoriously bad at dealing with any 'special needs'". There are some people in Amtrak who have shown that they need retraining, or better yet, a dope slap. But I truly believe the good employees vastly outnumber the bad.

Oh, I absolutely agree. I mean at the institutional level, entirely. They aren't getting "how to deal with special needs" training from the top; they aren't getting supervision and guidance. Even the good employees, who vastly outnumber the bad, are *personally playing it by ear* when helping to deal with special needs. They shouldn't have to.

I think he's talking at the institutional level, since it's seemingly unknowable if the particular thing he's allergic to is in any of the food served.

All of the good employees in the world can't be accommodating if they aren't provided with the tools to do so.

This is the obvious example. Some of the on-board employees promptly went and dug up the boxes. Others said that the boxes were destroyed before loading on the train (why would some trains do this and others not?!?) Nobody in the central office was willing to help at all.

But another example: when my fiancee needs mobility assistance through one of the less-than-fully-accessible stations, we've gotten wildly different responses depending on what station we're at, or even who we deal with in the same station. Most individuals are very helpful; some are not helpful at all; but even the helpful ones have *different procedures* from each other. There is no standardization. The bottom-level employees are on their own, playing it by ear, and seem to have little or no management support. A certain amount of autonomy is good, but for something like Amtrak it would be good to have more standardization.

Same thing happens with special seating requests (a friend of mine needs to be able to elevate her legs at night for medical reasons). Totally different responses depending on who she happens to talk to. Most are helpful, some are unhelpful, but even the helpful ones are inconsistent.