worried about eating with others...

[Train Rider]

Unpleasant Person: You know, I really can't stand the President. He's trying to take our guns. And force us to buy health insurance. I heard he was born in Kenya. Who did you vote for?

Me: I voted for the Kenyan because he only hated 42% of America while the "real" American hated 47%.

We live in a world that is run by extroverts (because they are noisy and bossy and prefer to take control of things).

We live in a democracy that requires speaking up to be heard. It's a minor detail that seems to be lost on many.

Whatever you do, DO NOT ORDER THE CHICKEN DINNER.

I thought it was the fish you weren't supposed to order?

I will agree with you on the superiority of Hendricks.

 

[TimSpencer]

I was on a cruise for the first time a couple of years ago.

Great experience... but I hated eating with strangers during

the first few nights. For the last 8 days, we ordered room

service.

I bet this guy will be quite happy eating on Amtrak trains.

 

[SarahZ]

I am totally stealing that idea and making an Amtrak version. (The "I survived talking to strangers for X days!" image, that is.) My friends will get a kick out of it.

I do enjoy talking to other train nuts. We sat with one gentleman during lunch, and he uses Amtrak for every trip. So while I was still pretty shy and nervous, at least it was a subject I liked. We also sat with a couple from Chicago who were big Bears fans, so my boyfriend actually spoke up for a record 45 seconds straight and talked about Bears history with them. Then I took over, and we started talking about the architecture and museums. They had lots of restaurant suggestions, as well. So stuff like that is okay, and I'd be alright with sitting in the dining car if I could submit some kind of survey like they give you when assigning you a roommate in the dorms.

"I like people who talk about trains, Chicago, "Big Bang Theory", Shakespeare, da Bears, tourism, Europe, and food."

 

[TimSpencer]

..... Then I took over, and we started talking about the architecture.....

Hi! My name is Art Vandelay and I'm an architect..... (in addition to being a former New York Yankees employee... and an importer/exporter)

 

[the Other Mike]

"I like people who talk about trains, Chicago, "Big Bang Theory", Shakespeare, da Bears, tourism, Europe, and food."

I like talking about chicken dinners

 

[the_traveler]

What I did on my last trip was to have business cards with AU's website on them. (And thanks to Vista Print being part of Points for Shopping, earned AGR points for it!). Then when others at my table say "it's my first trip on Amtrak", I hand them the card! What better icebreaker than talking about AU and answering their questions? :blush:

BTW: On my last trip, I handed out well over 50 of those cards!

 

[Alexandria Nick]

When asked what I do for a living, I always take the opportunity to have some fun and enhance my acting skill-set.
Heart Surgeon is a favorite. Communications Director for a Presidential campaign is a close second. However, FBI Agent inspires the most moronic questions from table mates.

It's great fun and as a result I never believe anything anyone says to me across a dining car table.

I have one of those jobs that those conversations go:

Other Person: So what do you do?

Me: Impressive sounding title at awesome place to work.

Other: That sounds neat, what do you do all day?

Me: Can't say (which is secretly a plus for me because its actually way more mundane than it sounds)!

 

[SarahZ]

I stopped telling people I work in insurance because I end up spending the entire meal listening to them complain about their latest claim nightmare and/or insurance in general. It makes me feel like I'm at work, except I'm not getting paid, so it drives me CRAZY. I'm on vacation. I can't answer your questions or address your issues for a variety of reasons. Leave me alone and call your agent.

Now I just tell people I'm a student, which isn't a lie, but it isn't the whole truth either. It's just soooo much easier. Of course, then they ask what I'm studying, I say, "English," and they look like they just swallowed a lemon while asking, "What are you going to do with thaaaat? Teach?"

Maybe a fake persona is the way to go after all. ^_^

 

[Devil's Advocate]

I have one of those jobs that those conversations go:

Other Person: So what do you do?

Me: Impressive sounding title at awesome place to work.

Other: That sounds neat, what do you do all day?

Me: Can't say (which is secretly a plus for me because its actually way more mundane than it sounds)!

I'm absolutely shocked that [insert impressive job here] is way more mundane than it sounds.

All jobs are like that. That's why we call them jobs and not hobbies.

 

[the_traveler]

That's one reason I like to hand out the cards. Another thing that helps start non-work conversations is the following:

Passenger: Where are you going?

Me: Rhode Island.

Passenger: But we are on the SL in NM headed for LAX? :blush:

They don't ask about my work!

 

[AmtrakBlue]

I have one of those jobs that those conversations go:

Other Person: So what do you do?

Me: Impressive sounding title at awesome place to work.

Other: That sounds neat, what do you do all day?

Me: Can't say (which is secretly a plus for me because its actually way more mundane than it sounds)!

I'm absolutely shocked that [insert impressive job here] is way more mundane than it sounds.
All jobs are like that. That's why we call them jobs and not hobbies.

Well, then, I guess I've been paid may times for just doing my hobby.

 

[lthanlon]

I dislike how people are pigeonholed once employment status is revealed, so in my dining car conversations I never ask what someone does for a living, nor do I reveal my job. It's much more interesting to find out about my dining companions as people, not job descriptions. Of course, at some point they usually feel compelled to reveal what they do (or did) for a living -- and will inevitably ask about me.

I often avoid revealing that part of my work as an editor involves proofreading crossword puzzles, as that opens a torrent of complaints about the frequency of ERNE, EWER, AVERT, ERR and YOKO and ONO. Not to mention the older lady at dinner on the Empire Builder who insisted that the word *** shows up way too often. When I explained that the clue is always something like "Buffoon" or "Donkey" and never a reference to a body part, she smiled derisively and declared, "Well, that's what you might say, but I'm sure you all still think it's funny."

She's right! :giggle:

 

[the Other Mike]

I'll be in my room drinking Bomabay Sapphire martinies with olives and fish

Hendricks is twice as good as Sapphire any day of the week.

I've never tried it but I'll make sure to. Gin drinkers are a very special breed.

 

[SarahZ]

I dislike how people are pigeonholed once employment status is revealed, so in my dining car conversations I never ask what someone does for a living, nor do I reveal my job. It's much more interesting to find out about my dining companions as people, not job descriptions. Of course, at some point they usually feel compelled to reveal what they do (or did) for a living -- and will inevitably ask about me.
I often avoid revealing that part of my work as an editor involves proofreading crossword puzzles, as that opens a torrent of complaints about the frequency of ERNE, EWER, AVERT, ERR and YOKO and ONO. Not to mention the older lady at dinner on the Empire Builder who insisted that the word *** shows up way too often. When I explained that the clue is always something like "Buffoon" or "Donkey" and never a reference to a body part, she smiled derisively and declared, "Well, that's what you might say, but I'm sure you all still think it's funny."

She's right! :giggle:

Truth; although, I am jealous of your job. I miss being an editor, and proofreading crossword puzzles sounds like fun.

 

[D.P. Roberts]

I'll be in my room drinking Bomabay Sapphire martinies with olives and fish

Well, SOMEBODY has been drinking, because I never said that!

 

[Ispolkom]

Passenger: Where are you going?Me: Rhode Island.

Passenger: But we are on the SL in NM headed for LAX? :blush:

They don't ask about my work!

Yes, we got a lot of odd looks on the west-bound Sunset Limited when we said we were going to St. Paul from Houston.

I never talk about politics, religion, or *** in the dining car. When someone tries to steer the conversation there I just say, "I don't talk about politics," and refuse to do so. Usually the guy (and it's always a guy, in my experience) gets an elbow in the ribs, and the conversation steers to more neutral topics, like whether the chicken dinner is as good as everyone says, how late the train is running, etc. On one trip we ran into a series of fellow opera fans, and that was fun, but I was brought up that it's polite to make conversation at a meal, even with strangers with whom you have nothing in common.

I figure that It's Just Lunch, I'm doing my aged mother proud, and this too shall pass. Sadly, on our last trip we ended up eating several meals in a row with Complainer Guy. That got old fast, because I hate whiners, and he hated us not letting him whine.

 

[Alexandria Nick]

I have one of those jobs that those conversations go:

Other Person: So what do you do?

Me: Impressive sounding title at awesome place to work.

Other: That sounds neat, what do you do all day?

Me: Can't say (which is secretly a plus for me because its actually way more mundane than it sounds)!

I'm absolutely shocked that [insert impressive job here] is way more mundane than it sounds.
All jobs are like that. That's why we call them jobs and not hobbies.

I'm a consultant for NASA. I don't discourage people from letting their imaginations run away from them!

 

[JayPea]

When asked, I tell people the truth: I work at a grocery store. There's absolutely nothing fascinating or scintillating about that, so that conversation ends right away.

 

[Reno89502]

About the worst experience I had eating with others was on a trip on the LSL. Me and my partner were in the dining car when the LSA sat a nice middle aged couple down with us. After some polite conversation, and as our food arrived, they asked us what we were doing in New York. Me and my partner replied that we got married, since it was one of the states that allowed Same *** marriage. The couples mouths dropped to the table, and they immediately called over the LSA. When she asked what was wrong, the male of the couple replied "You have to move us to another table". When she asked why, the guy said "WE do not sit with sinners!!" The LSA looked at them and with a bizarre look on her face, she said "There are no more seats available, so you will have to sit here". The couple said that they will not eat with us, started to get up and leave. The LSA said to them, "Let me get your bill", and they refused to pay since they didn't get to finish their dinner, and left the car. The LSA just looked at us, shook her head, laughed and said to us "Well, they better not sit in coach. I am sure there are a few sinners back there!". We finished our dinner and started back to our room as the LSA was sending the conductor to get them and make them pay their bill.

 

[daveyb99]

...it's not something we do in daily life. I know I can ask for food to be brought to our room, but the dining car is supposed to be part of the experience.I imagine weird people, disagreeable people, obsessive talkers, foamers, spitters, birthers...to say nothing of the waitstaff.

If needed, can we pick up our plates and escape to our rooms? Sort of like carryout? We'd skip dessert in any case.

Is it safe to assume that breakfast and lunch are served quickly and so require less social interaction than dinner does? If so, we can do dinner in the room.

wow .... who would want to eat with your knowing that is your opinion of you fellow man. Ever think others think the same of you? Please ... grab you plate and run, ok? Or better yet, stay off AMTRAK. I mean really .......

 

[NW cannonball]

About the worst experience I had eating with others was on a trip on the LSL. Me and my partner were in the dining car when the LSA sat a nice middle aged couple down with us. After some polite conversation, and as our food arrived, they asked us what we were doing in New York. Me and my partner replied that we got married, since it was one of the states that allowed Same *** marriage. The couples mouths dropped to the table, and they immediately called over the LSA. When she asked what was wrong, the male of the couple replied "You have to move us to another table". When she asked why, the guy said "WE do not sit with sinners!!" The LSA looked at them and with a bizarre look on her face, she said "There are no more seats available, so you will have to sit here". The couple said that they will not eat with us, started to get up and leave. The LSA said to them, "Let me get your bill", and they refused to pay since they didn't get to finish their dinner, and left the car. The LSA just looked at us, shook her head, laughed and said to us "Well, they better not sit in coach. I am sure there are a few sinners back there!". We finished our dinner and started back to our room as the LSA was sending the conductor to get them and make them pay their bill.

LOL! Seems like your LSA was one of the better ones. I've never had a table-mate do a dodger on the tab on "moral" grounds. I have dined with a few - what did the OP post - foamers, motormouths, complainers -and some abnormally silent (don't respond to "could you please pass the butter?) but dining car is a new experience for some, and most of us make the best of it and sometimes the best is good, mostly so-so, rarely bad.

None of which puts me off of dining in the diner. Most of the people you meet in the diner are peaceful, polite, and willing to do small talk to pass the time. Sometimes you meet very compatible and competent people. Very rarely, you will meet the new love of your life. It's random. It's OK. For agoraphobics, it could be a densensitizing thing.

Me, not so good at small talk, blatherers or obsessives or conspiracy theorists or Nosy Parkers or silent types seem not much trouble, and sometimes - real good and informative travelling companions.

 

[NW cannonball]

...it's not something we do in daily life. I know I can ask for food to be brought to our room, but the dining car is supposed to be part of the experience.I imagine weird people, disagreeable people, obsessive talkers, foamers, spitters, birthers...to say nothing of the waitstaff.

If needed, can we pick up our plates and escape to our rooms? Sort of like carryout? We'd skip dessert in any case.

Is it safe to assume that breakfast and lunch are served quickly and so require less social interaction than dinner does? If so, we can do dinner in the room.

wow .... who would want to eat with your knowing that is your opinion of you fellow man. Ever think others think the same of you? Please ... grab you plate and run, ok? Or better yet, stay off AMTRAK. I mean really .......

Guest MooGoo got whatever we here can offer. Guest was posing (posting) as "imaginary fear" Got many good responses. Been a good thread. Thanks Guest MooGoo. Hope your article or term paper sells .

Don't think MooGoo can keep up the pretense of being a "real person" with such real dread of all other humans.

But this has been a useful thread.

And in the unlikely event that MooGoo is anything other than a "test their experiences - make my story" troll. Like Ann Landers says -- please get professional help.

I've never actually feared another passenger on Amtrak, or JR, or anywhere on public transit. But if that happened - new thread.

 

[NS VIA Fan]

A lot of people just aren’t aware of the community seating in the diners and don’t realize they might be seated with others. Here’s a recent incident on VIA’s Ocean:

The Renaissance Diners have tables for two on one side of the aisle and for four on the other. I was just finishing coffee and great conversation with someone I had been seated with earlier at a table for two. Across the aisle was a couple who were probably about half-way through their meal. A young fellow came in and the attendant motioned for him to sit with them. The woman abruptly told the fellow “excuse me but we’re sitting here” The attendant came back and said he had just made the second call for dinner and he was going to need every seats They looked at each other, said something then got up and left.

The attendant started down the aisle behind them with their check but the LSA called him back (basically....forget about it) Then the attendant went back to the young fellow offering him a glass of wine along with the menu and said VIA would like to offer him a complementary meal!

It cost them three meals but they’ve probably got at least one customer returning....the other two....don’t know!

 

[SarahZ]

About the worst experience I had eating with others was on a trip on the LSL. Me and my partner were in the dining car when the LSA sat a nice middle aged couple down with us. After some polite conversation, and as our food arrived, they asked us what we were doing in New York. Me and my partner replied that we got married, since it was one of the states that allowed Same *** marriage. The couples mouths dropped to the table, and they immediately called over the LSA. When she asked what was wrong, the male of the couple replied "You have to move us to another table". When she asked why, the guy said "WE do not sit with sinners!!" The LSA looked at them and with a bizarre look on her face, she said "There are no more seats available, so you will have to sit here". The couple said that they will not eat with us, started to get up and leave. The LSA said to them, "Let me get your bill", and they refused to pay since they didn't get to finish their dinner, and left the car. The LSA just looked at us, shook her head, laughed and said to us "Well, they better not sit in coach. I am sure there are a few sinners back there!". We finished our dinner and started back to our room as the LSA was sending the conductor to get them and make them pay their bill.

I'm really sorry this happened to you. I would have been so excited to hear about your wedding. I love wedding stories and pictures.

At least you didn't have to spend dinner with them. I hope the LSA and conductor were able to track them down.

 

[NW cannonball]

Newly-weds and new parents - everybody cuts some slack for anybody in those two categories. It's some kind of cross-cultural thing, I think. Not saying that Reno needed any slack.